Hey hey, my friends! I just got back from a conference in Florida and had less than 36 hours to pack for Burning Man, where I’m going to be helping out the folks providing psychedelic support services at Zendo there …
and I just couldn’t do a new episode and spend time with my kiddo and family during that short window at the same time.
I was thinking how maybe like 5 years ago, I would have done the damn episode, thinking I had more of an obligation to crank one out that spend time with my kid, or to try and sleep, because it was “work” and I was the primary breadwinner, so no excuses in order to provide.
I’m really grateful that now I have so much more clarity about how to prioritize my life, but whew…being raised by an immigrant Filipinx mama who sacrificed so much for me makes choosing self care and small precious moments hard to choose over work sometimes.
Now one of the bonuses of having your own business is you get to make your own rules. And one of my rules is living by example, so I hope that by doing this and offering you this replay about reflecting on our impermanence, that it helps you remember to prioritize what really matters.
You know, it took some serious universal 2x4s hitting me upside the head to remind me that I was going to die and didn’t know when – and that it’s true for all of us. Not just me when I had a serious form of cancer. Not just me when I got another cancer diagnosis. Not just when we are given a heads up that we might not have much time left.
It’s after I was hit by a drunk driver. Or feeling a boulder whiz inches by my head on a climb. Or getting a message about my mom’s unexpected death while checking my messages in Morocco.
Our impermanence is not a thing to pay attention to just when something really horrible happens.
This sacred moment for us will happen in an ordinary moment, just. like. this one. Which is why I picked this Greatest Hits topic to replay for you today.
Think about this for a minute: if you knew – like really knew – you only had a year or a month or however long left to live, how would your mindset change? How many of those inner obstacles currently holding you back would fall away if you truly grasped the impermanent nature of your own life?
Because we think we have time, we spend time on habits (mental, physical, and spiritual) that distract us from creating the life we’re meant to live. We allow ourselves to remain in that comfortable cocoon of “for now” because we’d really rather avoid having to deal with the anxiety, fear and overwhelm that we’d have to overcome to take action. We wait for… another time.
We put the important things off.
We put off the big adventure – and it’s not just the adventures we put off
We put off the inner work, too
We put off forgiving that thing that happened a long ass time ago.
We put off telling someone we love them
We put off just letting ourselves be fucking happy already.
One of the main reasons we do this is because we believe we will have tomorrow, or next month, or next year, or after we retire, or after we graduate, or after we get the raise…
But we don’t know that.
Today we’re digging into a couple topics that many people like to avoid the most: the true impermanence of our time here on earth, and the big kicker, the uncomfiest of subjects: death.
But hang with me, there’s a method to this madness!
The first step to changing our mindsets and our actions to create the lives we really want, we have to talk about these things. To recognize, sit with and meet them head on. Because when we fully realize 1. how precious, fleeting, and miraculous this life of ours is, and 2. we are going to die and we don’t know when—that is when we truly start living.
Our hearts open, we give love freely, we find the courage to face our fears and start living the way we’ve been longing to, right now. Believe me, I learned this the hard way.
It isn’t just me who thinks all this. Meditating on the preciousness and impermanence of this human life are the first two steps on the Tibetan Buddhist Path to Enlightenment. In this tradition, it isn’t until you have grasped these two concepts that you can move on to the other stages on the path to enlightenment.
And you know what? The other truth is, if you’re living a life that is not in alignment with your truth, with who you are…an authentic life of love, compassion and integrity and whatever else you value – freedom, passion, joy, adventure – then life is going to feel too long – no matter how short.
So you see, the preciousness of this life, the impermanence of it, death…these things aren’t something we should ignore or put off as depressing.
When we are aware of them, we live life more fully.
And while we can’t live every day like it’s our last, we CAN ask ourselves what would make today a good day? One we have no regrets about. One that might even be a good day to die.
Or at least not be a shitty day to die.
I invite you to be brave today, to sit with these topics that may have previously been sources of fear and anxiety for you, and to see them in a new light – a sexy light. A liberating light. And a motivating one.
I hope that at the very least, this replay helps you think of one thing you can do today that you normally wouldn’t have done because you have a moment of clarity about what really matters.
In This Episode You’ll Learn:
// How to stop avoiding thinking about death – and how to instead acknowledge what facing it can teach you about living now
// A few ways to shift your mindset about impermanence + use it to mentally reframe your own narrative
// About one of my biggest regrets in life and some life-altering decisions I made along the way – how they pushed me to create the life I wanted and live in integrity
// Why your fear of death is actually your deeper fear that you have not lived your truest life (Steve Chandler)
// How to stop putting off the things that make us happy for ‘another time’ and start living fully now
// Why we must recognize the preciousness of human life in order to take real action toward making the most of the time we have
// Join the waitlist for the Adventure Mastermind at AdventureMastermind.com and save the dates for the first retreat of the next round, sometime the week of March 25th in Baja, Mexico. Get clear about your unique Soul purpose and how to create a life that supports it during this one precious life we have.
// If you’re new to the squad, grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics.
// Want to dive into this work on a deeper level on your own time? To study it and practice it together with a group of people with the same goals of freedom, adventure and purpose? Check out Freedom School – the community for ALL things related to freedom, inside and out