Ep. 26: Welcome to Being Human

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Humans go through life thinking that feelings happen TO us. We think, “Ugh I am so stressed out, I wish it would stop!” Oftentimes, we act so confused about where it is coming from.

Or we say, “OMG I am so irritable today.”

Or in a funk.

Or anxious.

Or sad…maybe there’s some grieving going on.

We feel powerless a lot of the time. Like our emotions can just take over and make us victims of a bad mood.

The antidote?

Really learning about feelings and how they work; making a concerted effort to learn how to manage our emotions instead of letting them control us.

We all think we know what feelings are, but we often struggle when it comes to labeling what we’re feeling, or naming why we are feeling different emotions – and what the hell we want to DO with those feelings.

Do we actually let ourselves feel them?

Resist them? Or avoid them?

React to them?

Here’s the thing: 

Feelings are part of the human experience, not an aberration. We are supposed to feel different feelings all the time.

What we often miss is that it is also totally normal to have a contrast of positive and negative feelings.

Truth is, you need the dark to see the light; you need the contrast. They can’t exist without one another.

We wouldn’t be able to distinguish joy without sadness.

Energy without fatigue.

In spite of this, most of us are under the assumption that life “should” be better than it is. 

We desperately want there to be more good in the world than bad. 

But what we don’t realize is that this one belief has caused more pain and violence than has ever been necessary. 

In today’s episode, we dig into why accepting the first noble truth of Buddhism – that suffering exists, that it’s part of being a human – will enable us to take an actual step towards freedom.

I introduce you to a new way of looking at the world, which might change the way you think, feel, and ultimately, the results you create in your life. 

So, I invite you to hear this, to let it sit with you:

:: Get to know the shadow side of your life – work to understand it, not hide from it, resist it, or pretend it’s not there.

:: Change your internalized narrative that you should be happy all the time, and that negative emotions are something to eradicate. Embrace the necessary balance that contrast offers.

:: Stop trying to escape reality – redirect the energy you spend buffering (overdrinking, gambling, overworking…etc) toward learning to manage your emotions, the highest ones and the lowest.

When you do this, your power to effect change in the world increases exponentially.

Because this gift of feeling the range of emotions – it’s part of our journey in this life, in this body, on this planet, in this community we are in.

And remember: whatever is happening right now – it won’t last. That’s the nature of things. Change. Impermanence.

Something wonderful will happen. Then something hard. Then something awe-inspiring. Then something heartbreaking.

My friends, welcome to humaneness.

In This Episode You’ll Learn:

  • Why the human experience is a balance of positive and negative emotions
  • That we have the ability to create, allow, or resist emotion – and why this matters big time
  • What the 4 Noble Truths of Buddhism are, and why learning to accept these truths is an immensely courageous act
  • Why the Brooke quote “Discomfort is the price of your dreams” hits so close to home for me, and (after listening) hopefully it will for you too
  • How to start choosing your emotions – and some tips on cultivating true self awareness
  • Why being 100% happy and positive all the time is NOT the end goal – and what it takes to be fully present for this beautiful messiness that is the human experience

Resources:

// Check out Episode 24 on How to Feel ANY Emotion

// If you’re new here, grab the starter kit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll get access to the private Facebook group where you can ask me questions! Once you join, there’s also a weekly FB live called Wake the F*ck Up Wednesday, where you can ask questions that come up as you do this work – in all parts of your life.